Another chance maybe?

Hi, I'm back!! It's been quite a while since I've updated my blog. Lately, things are getting well, down the hill 

and disappointments happens and I guess it's part of LIFE so I'll just bear with it first.

I've given hopes for IPG actually, when I was a so FREE that time because I was waiting for the interview

call and everything. And LUCKILY I've got the interview which I didn't gave any little hope of it.. okay

you've caught me erm maybe just a tiny winy one? okay so I've got it and was trilled and so happy I mean

like I've a jackpot that kind of happiness. The interview was on  my birthday as I've mention before in my

previous posts. And the results..... I was so confident yet like they say, the higher the expectations, the more 

the disappointment.. The results came out and ya I've failed to get the course.. I was so sad.. so

DISAPPOINTED.. I've shut myself down and wishing it was only a dream.. I've cried, I've asked WHY so 

many WHYs in my head.. Asking, Am I not good enough? So many questions without answers spinning 

around in my head.. 

The reason I've been sad is that, 

I've let my daddy down.. He really hoped that I will get the course but sadly, I've failed.. Sorry daddy.. I've 

tried my best and yet I am still not good enough I guess. I'm sorry

I've let my family, I've broke my family's heart. My sister was hoping so much that I've got them and will be 

able to study with her.. but in the end a big disappointment I've felt really sorry for her too.. Sorry sis, I can't 

make it.. 

At time like this, I always keep myself happy and joyful so i won't feel sad whenever it comes to mind again..

But it's a scar in my heart that will always be there, an ugly scar when people talked about it, I still feel the

pain just like smearing salt on a cut.. It's so painful till I cry again.. I'd cried a lot actually I do have my weak

side too, but I will positive for sure cause I'll have another go next year! I'll try best to get it next year and

that is the last hope I'm giving in to chase my DREAMS. 

I believe that, When god closes one door, he opens another. 

When you don't give up this minute, there will still be hope in the next second. 


 Now before next year, I'll be staying in Kuching, studying in Swinburne. Will be studying foundation but

I don't really have interest in the course this is true I admit. My mum wants me to find a part time job so I can

work for own pocket money. Well I do have targets now, the only thing is it's hard to find a suitable job D: 

I will work hard for that. 

I will still dream my dream till someday my dreams come true.

I believe that dreams do come true because I am a dreamer..

  When My Dreams come true, It will be beautiful :) 


Thanks for reading,
Loretta. 
XOXO